SELF PORTRAIT THURSDAY!
8.28.14

SELF PORTRAIT THURSDAY! 8.28.14

 

Hey there. It’s Thursday! I’m posting later than I’d like, but it’s been pretty busy at the salon. Plus, I had some other writing to do for the salon. And you know what, it’s actually hard to write at the salon because the phone rings a lot. Or I am called to do something. My train of thought gets broken up.

So, the past week I’ve been in worry mode about getting everything in order for the Provincetown show. Like to the point where I wake up at 4:30AM and can’t go back to sleep—I know I’m awake when my toes start to wiggle—and I’m just thinking “Well, how am I going to do this…?” and “How am I supposed to pay for that…?” The logistics of everything have been getting to me, so I’ve been getting out of bed, taking my pillows to the living room, putting on anything random on Netflix, taking a couple hits off the bowl—just bought some White Widow!—and forcing myself to watch and chill. Eventually I fade back to sleep. You know, when it’s time to wake up and get ready for work. 

But I woke up this morning and decided to get into solution mode and restructure my thoughts so that I’m not going crazy. And the day’s been great.

Ben’s birthday was this past weekend, and it was so fun! We partied really hard on Friday night… Didn’t get to bed til almost 5AM. (I never do that. I always get sleepy around 11PM.) We had friends in town, too. Our good friend Meredith, who actually introduced us way back in the day one snowy morning at Vassar, was in town. And these guys Aaron and John, who are in this rad band from Portland called Nurses, were in town recording their new album. So, there was good company and lots of laughs. 

It was a very spendy, decadent weekend that I was happy to have. And that I was happy to have over. My body needs to recuperate. I’m 30!

xo
craig

 

SELF PORTRAIT THURSDAY
8.21.14

SELF PORTRAIT THURSDAY! 8.21.14
Hey friends. Happy Thursday.

Woke up a bit hungover this morning. Headache and ravenous. And my body was warm. I felt like a Hot Pocket. Put on some clothes and flip flops and went looking for a breakfast sandwich, but the place I went to was closed. So, I bought a currant roll, a coconut roll, and some bread pudding from the Caribbean bakery I go to (too much). I still feel a little out of it, but that’s what you get when you drink three Brooklyn Lagers on an empty stomach.

(I’m also a lightweight…)

I have some painting to do this evening.

Which reminds me: the Provincetown show is for real happening. I’ll be in Provincetown pretty shortly. Just September 8-10. But yeah, I have a deadline of next Friday to ship the framed paintings to the gallery. It’s pretty exciting. And I still gotta get stuff together. And I know I’ll be a little stressed making sure everything looks okay. But this is a good thing. And I’m happy to get this going. I hope it’s the first of many shows.

It’s coming up so soon, too!

Right when I get back from Cape Cod, my sister and her husband will be in Jersey that weekend. So, that will be great. I’m excited to see her. (Then I’m planning on flying her to NYC to October so she can stay longer.) Good things coming up in September.

Ben’s birthday is this weekend! He’s turning 30, too. I’m excited to spend the weekend with him. I still have to find just the right birthday card for him, though… I’ll let you know how his birthday weekend goes.

xo
craig

SELF PORTRAIT THURSDAY!
8.14.14

SELF PORTRAIT THURSDAY! 8.14.14

Hey friends. Happy Thursday.

Sorry I missed last Thursday… I feel like I had a pretty good reason for not posting last week. But I can’t remember. Either it was a stressful day OR it was laundry day and I looked like shit. Who knows. But I’m here now!

I’m still feeling a little stressed out. Just getting things in order for the show in Provincetown. It’s not like there’s a crazy amount of things to do. I have a feeling I might be overreacting. I just want things to go smoothly and to look nice.

It’ll be fine, I know. I just need to stop being a little bitch.

I think I’ve also been mourning Robin Williams! I never thought about him very much. I just knew he was an actual actor. Like a really, really talented guy who was in some movies I’d seen. He was the real deal. But to find out this man, who’s usually all smiles, takes his own life… It really messes with your head.

I keep seeing random posts on Facebook or Twitter about his death. Like “Suicide is so cowardly” or “It’s his right to commit suicide’. Things like that. Really oppositional sides. Of course, it’s the internet! You’re either with us or against us. Does anybody exist in the middle anymore?

Personally I get upset about people taking their own lives. My father’s father killed himself when my father was pretty young, and it’s always made me mad. I couldn’t imagine ever doing that or ever having that happen. I get upset about the emotional state a suicidal person is in. But I also get upset about all the loose ends and hurt people that are left behind. Like, how is that fair to your children to do that? I think suicide is a sad and selfish act.

There. I said it, internet.

But on another note, on the day he died, a friend and I were walking in the East Village and passed by Gilbert Gottfried, who did the voice of Iago the parrot in “Aladdin”, which Robin Williams was also in—as Genie. I remember seeing that movie in the third grade, and it really inspired me to learn how to draw. The lines that made up Genie really stuck with me, and the first thing I did when I got home that night was draw.

So, there’s that. (Sorry, didn’t mean to take it there.)

xo
craig

PS
I re-watched “Aladdin” in the past year or so. It still holds up!

SELF PORTRAIT THURSDAY!
7.31.14

SELF PORTRAIT THURSDAY! 7.31.14

Hey friends. Happy gray Thursday.

You can’t tell from the photo, but I’m totally channeling this guy’s look. Got my tank top tucked into my pants and everything. It’s a photo of some Bushwick dude back in the 70s. (I’m actually convinced that Bushwick still looks like that.) All I need is a long necklace. I’m going to be commissioning one from Walt Cassidy some time soon… I wear the bracelet I got from him everyday. I feel naked without it.

Not that nudity is a bad thing.

My week has been good. Was in the Berkshires all weekend. It’s very green and winding. I like driving in a car through forests when it’s dark outside. It’s scary and exciting at the same time. I’m always a little nervous being in a car because you just never know… But it’s nice being locked inside away from evil forest spirits. You’ve seen Evil Dead. You know how it goes.

We stayed in this pretty rad house that used to be a mill.  (What exactly is a mill?) Apparently Hitchcock stayed there before so there were some of his movies and mystery books laying around the house. There was a creek that ran behind the house, so we slept with our window open to listen to the running water all night. It was really nice. I love being in the forest.

I got to see Mass MOCA. They had a really great Sol LeWitt exhibition that did a lot more for me than the one at Dia:Beacon. Visually it was more exciting to me—to the point where I remember exclaiming aloud “Ooooo!” and slapping Ben on the shoulder excitedly. (I think the last time that happened was when Amy Poehler showed up to that New Year’s Eve party I was at a couple years ago…)

Not much else on the horizon besides prepping paintings for the Provincetown show. There are actually a couple I need to reproduce. Then framing. Then shipping. Then planning my visit there.

Have a good weekend.

xo
craig

SELF PORTRAIT THURSDAY!
7.24.14

SELF PORTRAIT THURSDAY! 7.24.14

Hello hello hello.

It’s Thursday. But it’s my Friday. And yesterday was my Monday, so figure that one out.

Leaving for Connecticut in the morning. Really excited to get out of town. I feel like my normal rituals are stifling any creative ideas I have in my head. I need to replenish what’s in my head. Running on fumes here. My excitement to take on new work is always at its highest after getting back from a trip—even a day trip—or doing something new or out of the ordinary.

I’ve got some ideas in my head right now but haven’t really felt motivated to complete them. I’m not being totally lazy, though. Sketches are made, ready to become paintings.

Also been working out every morning. Got back into a more strict diet. Lots of greens and protein and whole grains. (Although there was one night when I was a little stoned and came across a banana pudding ice cream and then ate the entire pint…)

I’d been feeling a little bogged down physically. Only working out once or twice a week. Not eating enough greens. Frequenting my favorite local Caribbean bakery, Allan’s. (Since 1961!) Grabbing a pint of banana pudding from Magnolia Bakery on my way home from work. You know how it goes.

I’m just looking to clear my mind and my body, okay?

And I’m ready for the weekend. I’m ready to not look at people on at the subway. And hey, I’m also ready not to wake up at 630 or 7AM to exercise.

xo
craig

SELF PORTRAIT THURSDAY!
7.17.14

SELF PORTRAIT THURSDAY! 7.17.14

Hey friends. Happy Thursday.

Hope all is well. All is good with me. Just listening to tons of Missy Elliott. And I’ve been making a couple paintings inspired by really good sex and Missy’s music. See here and here. I thought I’d give the babies a rest. Nap time. And explore some other things I have in mind.

Things are coming together with my little show in Provincetown later on this summer. I’ve never discussed framing so much before. I’m getting really tired of talking about it. The coast still isn’t clear, but… I’m getting there. I can’t wait to see them framed and shipped. I’ll discuss the details closer to the date.

Currently reading this book called “Testo Junkie: Sex, Drugs, and Biopolitics in the Pharmacopornographic Era”. It’s a bit dense but interesting enough. I think a lot of it has to do with how the economy has shifted from being industrial and selling us products to getting more life from selling us ideas and thoughts and drugs and such. And how that relates/controls gender. “Gender”? Hey, I’m not done. I’ll get back to you.

I’ve also been watching a lot of shows about tattooing. I’m setting up an appointment at Saved in Williamsburg. I’d tell you what I’m going to get, but… I’m going to wait. But it’s going to be a portrait tattoo on my inner arm. I’ll be on blast.

Might do a day trip to Fire Island on Monday. Then I’m going to Connecticut for the weekend with Ben and his family. Busy week.

And I still don’t feel like I have a proper summer tan yet…

xo
craig

SELF PORTRAIT THURSDAY!
7.10.14

SELF PORTRAIT THURSDAY! 7.10.14

Hey, guys.

The birthday was honestly an all-around great day. Our little trip upstate was very peaceful. The room we got was fancy without being annoying. (Like, have you ever stayed at the W Hotel? It feels like a space aged office building. Not into it.) The sunset over the Hudson River was a nice treat, too. I got everything I wanted and then some.

Here’s a photo of me in my birthday hot tub.

People keep asking me how it feels to be thirty. So far it feels like I’m 29. I had to fill out some form today and accidentally wrote 29 when it asked for my age.

But honestly I still feel 23. I feel like a kid trying to figure out how I’m going to make it in NYC.

Lately I’ve thought about back when I was working at the school bookstore in college. This man used to come in and sell used books. Where he got them, I have no idea. He was originally from NYC and had moved to Houston after 9/11. Once he brought me some photos from that day. One of the photos was a portrait of himself with the WTC burning in the background.

Anyway, he would talk to me about NYC, and I told him I wanted to live there one day—but didn’t know how it was going to happen since it was so expensive. He told me that what I need to do is show up and just sell little stuff that people want/need.

I think at the time I was like, “Uh, yeah, whatever, dude…” I mean, I didn’t exactly feel like moving to NYC to sit on the side of the street selling shitty souvenirs or whatever to tourists. It’s not an idea I found particularly attractive.

BUT I’ve realized that’s exactly what I did. I wished really hard to get out of my situation in Texas and move away to NYC. And luckily I had a helping hand in getting here and having a place to stay and work. And a bulk of my early work consisted of selling silkscreen tees of my designs. I think they were about $20 or $25 each. And I sold a bunch of them. (I think at times I was making more than I am now.)

I needed to make a living in a place where I didn’t really know anyone at a time that the economy was crumbling. So, I showed up and started selling t-shirts people wanted (or needed for gifts).

And it was fun. But it got old after awhile. It’s hard to be your own boss.

Very rewarding, though. And it’s kinda nice people are still writing me to this day asking if I have any shirts left. Makes it feel like it wasn’t all for nothing.

That’s what’s on my mind right now.

Have a good weekend!
xo
craig

SELF PORTRAIT THURSDAY!
7.3.14

SELF PORTRAIT THURSDAY! 7.3.14

Hey there. It’s Thursday and so fucking muggy outside. I feel like I’m back in Houston. Also not into this portrait. But, hey, I’m in a great mood.

In lieu of working out the past few days, I have resumed writing in the mornings because I just felt like I had a lot on my mind that was clouding my thoughts and judgements. I think lately I’ve been falling back on sort of mental/creative blocks. There’s a fine line between smoking too much weed and being creative and just smoking too much weed. Hey, I think I’m in the clear, but I’m very sensitive about falling back into a creative slump, not keeping up with certain aspects of myself that need regular maintenance.

I went through a creative block for most of 2013 and definitely don’t want that to happen again. Not fun.

One goal I had written in January was to show some of my new work, and that’s actually happening in late summer. Getting a chance to show my paintings in Provincetown maybe late August/early September. It’s a baby step, but a good feeling. I’ve been surprised by the outcome of letting myself keep exploring certain inspirations. I’d never drawn babies before this year, and I’m never exactly sure what to make of the paintings after I finish them. But, hey, they make me laugh a lot when I’m doing the initial sketches, and the response has been good. Why not.

Anyway, 4th of July is tomorrow. I’m too sunburned from this past weekend to go to the beach, but luckily it’s supposed to be raining. Thinking of getting my aura portrait taken. Oh, and making a 4th of July-themed dessert. That’s definitely going to happen.

Next week is my birthday. The 3-0 one. I rented us a room upstate that is right on the Hudson River. Private sundeck. King size bed. Jacuzzi tub. I’m excited to do this right.

I’ll let you know how that goes. I’ll be a week older.

xo
craig

SELF PORTRAIT THURSDAY!
6.26.14

SELF PORTRAIT THURSDAY! 6.26.14

Hey friends. Happy Thursday.

Apologies for missing last week’s portrait. I just didn’t feel like it that day, and I thought that was strange. I thought to myself, “Maybe this is it. Maybe after seven or eight years, I don’t care about Self Portrait Thursday anymore.”

But I also felt myself to be tired and congested. And I’d also been waking up with really bad headaches. Eventually I realized I was sick and was just sorta phoning it in last week. I spent my Saturday in bed. Then spent Monday and Tuesday in bed, too. Recuperating.

It’s weird having to rest up. I wasn’t into it. But I like being healthy and energetic, so…

Last night was the first night I felt like doing something. I ended up going to the grocery store after getting off work, then I prepped a painting to work on maybe tonight or this weekend. (I hadn’t painted all week, which was also driving me crazy.)

It wasn’t all bad. In addition to all the DayQuil swallowed and multiple bowls smoked, I watched most of this documentary series called “The Story of Film”, which is exactly what is sounds like: history of cinema. But it didn’t focus on American cinema, which was great. It mostly is concerned with world cinema. And about 95% of the films I’ve never heard of. It’s a very interested and interesting series that I really enjoyed. It’s 15 one-hour segments. I’m on part 12 now… Determined to finish it.

It comes at a funny time because in my head a lot I think about how stupid films are. (I usually prefer to watch documentaries above anything else.) But I think I’m thinking of all the pointless Hollywood movies that are released. All the marketing and such that comes along with it. I forget that cinema is an artform, and there’s definitely inspired work out there.

I was wrong. I like that.

xo
craig

SELF PORTRAIT THURSDAY!
6.12.14

SELF PORTRAIT THURSDAY! 6.12.14

Hello.

Some portrait, right? It looks like my head is evaporating into white.

This week has been so dreary. It all seems like one long humid dark day. No commas there.

There’s not much to report this week. Just been working nonstop. Even on my days off I ended up working with my friend Paul, organizing and filing his artwork and such before his move to LA. It really was nonstop work. After the end of Day 1, Ben asked me, “So you guys socialized while working?” But, you know, there was very little socializing at all. Nonstop moving around.

But tomorrow the salon is closed, and I’m off Saturday. So I’ll have a legit weekend with Ben.

I’ll also be able to focus on this painting I’m working on. Sometimes I’ll come home from work and just do one step and call it a night. For instance, I’ll come home and come up with a design and draw it out. Then the next night I’ll project the image much larger onto my paper, then go over the pencil w/ ink. Then call it a night. And the next night I’ll do a background wash. And so on.

It’s hard to work like that, though. It definitely breaks up my concentration. I was doing that this week with a painting I THOUGHT I had a good feeling about but ultimately ended up scrapping because I couldn’t get it together.

I began work on a new painting that I feel is more focused and I feel more inspired by.

In other news, just working out a lot. Splurging where I shouldn’t be splurging.

I’m getting older everyday.

xo
craig

 

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